Most days on the lake you can pretty much go in any direction or speed you choose. On a windy or choppy day as you describe, you need to let the waves dictate your driving.
When we go from point to point with a cross wind, we think about which route will offer the most land protection. Waves get larger the longer distance they have to form. Rather than go across the waves, we drive in more of a Z pattern. Intentionally driving 45 degrees into the waves and then 45 degrees with the waves.
Often times the really big waves, the ones big enough to turn your boat, will come in patterns. You will see a few medium waves followed by a large. Once in a while, you see an opening where a section of of water is relatively lacking in waves. I find steering around the worst of the waves to be a reasonable strategy. You have to pay attention.
We have a bow rider as well. When the wave height causes the need to slow down, I use the tilt of the motor to lift the bow to avoid the risk of a wave crashing over the bow. My wife often leaves the bow cover on as an extra safety in the case that a wave does crash the bow, the water would be shed and not over weight the front of the boat at the worst time.
I think you will find it is a matter of experience. The biggest challenge I have now is trying to do all the right things for the safe passage of the boat and accomplish the secondary goal of keeping the passengers dry. It can be very cold in April to be getting wet.
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