Civility on the Forum

[Rattlesnake Gal]

A little while ago I was reading the new posts and came across the thread Illegal use of HP placard at Wolfeboro Town dock.

I was extremely shocked and disappointed that the thread had already been locked up - just over six hours after it had been posted!

This issue is an example of a perfect topic to discuss on this lake related forum.
It affects many of us and will be a growing issue with other lakeside towns in the future.
Coming up with a reasonable solution that might serve everyone, would be fantastic. We could make a difference!

When you are sitting at your computer and visiting our great Forum, please consider this a private gathering at a friend’s home.

This Forum is not anonymous! We are family here and members should be treated as such.

That is not to say that topics cannot be debated from all points of view. There is no reason to take a thread to a nasty level just because you are not face-to-face.

Please be considerate and use common sense when making any post.

If you are hiding a crude word with a picture or punctuation, you know you’ve overstepped the boundaries and you should step away from your computer!

If someone does post in this manner and it is aimed at you, carefully consider your options on how to proceed.

You can wait until the moderator sees the post and it will get deleted.
The offender will most likely be put under moderation. Don’t get drawn in!

Another option is to report the post to the moderator.

If you directly address the post, do not stoop to their level! Keep it civil and let this person know they have overstepped Forum rules.

Being under moderation on the Forum sounds like it is very frustrating experience.
Your posts will become buried and no one will see them.
Who wants that?!

I would like to appeal to the Webmaster to delete the offending posts from the aforementioned thread and reopen the topic for discussion.
A couple Forum members got off track, but we could begin again.
Thank you for your consideration.

I’m climbing down from my soapbox now. I love this Forum and have great affection and respect for everyone here.



Let's all have fun and share our enjoyment of of Lake Winnipesaukee at this wonderful playground we call the Forum.

With sincerity from your friend and Forum family member,


Celia

[webmaster]

I think closing a thread sometimes sends a stronger message than deletions. At least everyone can see clearly what I object to. That thread quickly turned into name-calling between 2 members and I didn't want it to escalate any further.

I agree that it is a worthy topic so I've removed the posts that were the problem and reopened the thread. If you choose to participate please be civil and avoid insults and name-calling.

There was an excellent thread a few year ago on the same topic which included some really good thoughts and ideas. The thread had various opinions without name-calling! Click here to read that thread.

[LIforrelaxin]

RG and Don, I believe both your post here where very well said.

I also must agree with Don, I believe although harsh sometimes to get peoples attention one must just stop the wheels of something. Obviously I never saw the concerned thread during the locked time period, And I have no idea what went on. However I would ask Don, potentially in the future when you lock a thread unless it is something obvious... speed limit etc. could you drop a one liner as the last comment on the thread... Simply saying "posters behaviors have cause this thread to be locked" It doesn't need to be a finger point, just a comment, enough so that we all know what happened.

[Argie's Wife]

Originally Posted by LIforrelaxin

RG and Don, I believe both your post here where very well said.

I also must agree with Don, I believe although harsh sometimes to get peoples attention one must just stop the wheels of something. Obviously I never saw the concerned thread during the locked time period, And I have no idea what went on. However I would ask Don, potentially in the future when you lock a thread unless it is something obvious... speed limit etc. could you drop a one liner as the last comment on the thread... Simply saying "posters behaviors have cause this thread to be locked" It doesn't need to be a finger point, just a comment, enough so that we all know what happened.

I agree.

I'm sometimes amazed at how quickly a simple thread can get nasty in no time flat while others that you'd expect to go south just don't... It's become worse lately, in my opinion.

[AB_Monterey]

I like to call them "Keyboard cowboys".

These are the people that would never dare say these things to someone face to face but feel emboldened when they can hide behind a keyboard.

Pathetic.

[Silver Duck]

it's not just our forum. Lack if civility seems to have become the norm in daily life, as well.

Perhaps it can, to some degree, be traced to the current high degree of political polarization and economic frustration in our country.

Extremists on both sides of the political spectrum seem bent on "demonizing" anybody that doesn't agree with them, with no regard, whatever, for common decency. That sets a bad example which, coupled with the high level of fear and frustration caused by the economy, has many folks ready to "lash out" at anything that annoys them and feeling free to do so.

My first awareness of such behavior becoming distressingly common in our forum was during the speed limit discussions; that subject polarized the living heck out of our fourm community (and still does). Though I rerely miss a day in logging on to the forum, I freely admit that the tone that many threads develop has turned my from a frequent poster back into a habitual lurker!

Silver Duck

[BroadHopper]

Originally Posted by Silver Duck

it's not just our forum. Lack if civility seems to have become the norm in daily life, as well.

Well said. I live on this lake since the 50's I use to enjoy the camaderie among those who enjoy using the lake.

Everyone use to enjoy being together and respect each other to be civil.

Today, I no longer received the 'boater's wave'. Property owners seemed to have a dislike for boaters. I have to drive defensively everywhere I go on the lake. I was even flipped the birdie by some elderly woman rowing a canoe!

And one flatlander from the South call this progress!

[sa meredith]

RG
While I agree with much of what you wrote, I believe Don wrote a post a while back, strongly discouraging members from freely posting there names and photos.
The simple fact is that in this day and age, there is no shortage of nut jobs that may choose to use that info for the wrong reasons.
At times, I have been sucked into some pretty nasty debates (for lack of a better word), and have indeed been threatened with physical violence.
To be fair, I have probably started my share of trouble as well.
Many poeple on this forum know me, and I consider several of them friends. They are people I had never met until chatting thru PMs, we caught up for a drink or two or whatever, and struck up friendships. That being said, I guess I would stop short of openly typing my name, as that would have proved a big mistake in the past.
Just my thoughts...
Happy Mother's day to all the Mothers....

[upthesaukee]

with posting of names. I have on a few occasions put just my first name down, and then wondered whether I really should have done that. It is bad enough I am on Facebook , so I should really be careful where else I post my name .
But I do wholeheartedly agree with RG on civility on the forum and in life in general. Even with my own grown kids, and I don't know where they got it from (probably society in general), get up on their high horse and pontificate way too much. They start to get very argumentative, but when they get the "Dad stare", they will usually bring it down several notches.
Maybe I can get a "smiley" made of my "Dad Stare" .